Category: Kerri’s Thoughts

Posted on

Dark Night of the Soul

I’ve been wanting to share something that I’ve experienced personally in the past few years. I have noticed a few others going through something similar, so I believe now would be a great time to share.

A few years ago, I went through the greatest season of loss I have experienced (since a divorce 20 years ago). This season has been very similar to a divorce but of greater capacity. This season of loss was not only of my job, but also of a great family of friends and many of those I loved in my own community.

Most detrimental (at the time, but now one that I am learning to be grateful for) was the loss of my identity. I pretty much lost everything that I ever knew to rely and depend on. What was one of the darkest seasons of my life led me to what I later learned was referred to as the dark night of the soul.

Continue reading “Dark Night of the Soul”

Posted on

Are You Bitter or Better?

“How do I know if I’m bitter?” I am often asked that question. Here are some ways you can tell:

Do people set your teeth on edge?

Who have you blocked on Facebook lately and why?

Do you cross the street when certain people come your way?

Does your jaw set when you think of somebody? And why?

When you hold onto unforgiveness and let it grow in your heart, before long you will have bitterness.

Bitterness grows roots that bury deep in your heart. It hurts you. It blocks God. It stunts your growth.

Continue reading “Are You Bitter or Better?”

Posted on

Follow the Pain

Have you ever wondered why we go through painful experiences? What purpose does it serve?

First, we need to remember it’s not about us. It’s all about God. When you go through a painful experience, God is trying to bring you to the end of yourself, so He can take over. He wants to stretch you and make you depend on Him. That doesn’t mean He causes the painful event, but He will certainly use it.

Did you know real emotional pain lasts only two minutes? The rest is perceived pain. We have a choice of how we respond to that perceived pain. It matters greatly what you do with your pain. Pain will point you to the path of your healing. Do you want to be healed? Follow the pain.

Continue reading “Follow the Pain”

Posted on

How Do I Learn to Hear God?

I am often asked these questions: “How do I learn to hear God? What does God’s voice sound like? Is it audible?”

God speaks to us in many ways:

Scripture
Nature
Impressions
Dreams

Sometimes people wonder if they are hearing God or talking to themselves.

There are only three voices you can hear in your spirit. It will either be God, the enemy, or your own voice. You will have to discern among those three voices.

Ask yourself: “Does what I am hearing line up with God’s Word and with His nature?”

It helps to practice talking to God. You can talk out loud to Him. The more you call on God and ask to hear His voice, the more you will be able to discern His voice.

Try this to start a conversation:

Say, “Jesus, I love you.” Then be really quiet. What do you hear? What did God say?

People have also asked me, “When I think I’m hearing from God is it because I want to do what I want to do?”

Again, does what you are hearing line up with God’s Word and with His nature?

What are your own motives in what you are asking Him? Are you being selfish and focused on you? Have you really asked God and are waiting to hear His response? Or did you just decide, “God, here is what I’m going to do, please bless it”?

Ask God something that’s on your heart. Listen for His answer. Check it out in the Bible. Does the answer you heard line up with what He says in His Word?

Another common question is this: “What if I don’t like His answer?”

What makes you think you wouldn’t like His answer? He always wants His best for you. Why do you assume you wouldn’t like His answer? Ask yourself where that concern is coming from.

If you hear His answer and don’t like it, ask yourself why you are reacting to it this way. What is His answer triggering inside of you?

Remember, God likes obedience. Have you ever given your children an answer they didn’t like?

Here is another frequent question: “Can other people hear from God for me?”

Yes, they can, but why would you want them to? Don’t you want to hear from Him yourself?

Other people can confirm what you are hearing, but God wants a relationship with you.

If someone hears a word from God for you, do you witness to what they say? Does it resonate with you? Be cautious of who is telling you. Don’t cast your pearls before swine.

If you feel that other people can hear God, but you can’t, ask yourself, “Who is God to me?”

Your relationship with your earthly father can affect how you hear from Father God.

Here are some ways you can get better at hearing God:

  • Study the Word. God speaks through His Word, and His Word helps you learn to hear His voice.
  • Talk to Him. Then listen for His response.
  • Journal what you hear from Him. Look to see if it lines up with His Word and His nature.
  • Build a friendship. Ask God a “get to know you” question you would ask a new friend.

Take some time now to practice. Ask God a question. Write the answer. Check that it lines up with His Word.

Keep practicing, and you will get better at hearing God.

Posted on

Keys to Being Real

God’s plan for freedom is beautifully simple. He gives us these keys to find healing in our hearts:

Repentance

When we repent for specific ways we have judged people, and for the lies we have taken into our hearts, we find freedom. Repentance allows us to break out of the enemy’s hold on our hearts. We replace lies with truth.

Forgiveness

Forgiveness is one of the most powerful healing tools God has given us. When we forgive, we release others to be who God has created them to be. And we free ourselves to step into healing of our hearts. The article Wash, Rinse, Repeat will help you learn more about the process of forgiveness.

Presence

We have the privilege every day to just sit still and be in God’s presence. Quieten yourself. It’s the hardest thing you’ll ever do for your life. Don’t expect it to get easier. It never changes. It’s always hard. But the results are life-saving. Presence. Don’t leave home without it.

Accountability

Find people, a tribe, a community that will help you when you’re good, bad, or indifferent. You can’t navigate your authenticity without it, because you lie to yourself, and the enemy reinforces those lies. You lie to yourself about yourself, so the reality is you only have the Word of God and your people to help you navigate what’s true about you.

Truth

Truth is your greatest weapon against the lies that have taken root in your heart. A lot of people avoid truth because it seems harsh. Here’s the reality: If truth can save your life, and heal you, don’t hide from it. If I went to my doctor’s office, and he discovered I had cancer, wouldn’t I want to know, so I can be healed? What if the doctor didn’t tell me because he was afraid the truth would “hurt” me? Let God’s truth do its work in your heart.

Peace

Peace is a Person (Ephesians 2:14-18; Isaiah 9:6.). As you develop the practice of peace, He, the Prince of Peace (Jesus) will walk with you and teach you how to live in the now (present), in the moment. Shalom is mind, body, spirit in complete unity and rest.

Wisdom

Wisdom is also a Person (Proverbs 1:20-33). She will take up residence and walk with you, after you search her out in God.

Sabbath

God rested on the seventh day. So should we. Not necessarily the literal seventh but at least one of every seven. One hour of every seventh hour during the day.

What does it mean to rest? Quieten yourself, do things you enjoy: art, nature, music, presence. Quiet. Fun. Adventure. Friends. Puppies. Whatever brings you joy … recalibrates you … resets you mind, body, spirit … resynchronizes you with the Creator in rest.

You have the keys to your identity. God has given you everything you need. You are ready to walk out your identity quest with Him.

This is the last article in the Identity Quest series, and I hope you have enjoyed this series. To see all of the Identity Quest articles, you can follow this link.

To read more articles on the topic of Identity (including the Identity Quest articles), you will find all of my Identity-related articles here. God bless you on your identity quest!

Posted on

Spiritual Identity Theft

God created you with an amazing identity. He has awesome plans for your life. Jesus wants to give you an abundant life (John 10:10) but the enemy has tried to steal your birthright. How? By trying to weigh down your heart with wounds and dysfunction. The enemy is the ultimate identity thief, and his goal is to replace God’s truth with hurts and lies in your heart.

Do you recognize any of these fruits in your life? This is the enemy’s plan for identity theft. (The links below will take you to more articles on those topics.)

Bitterness
Unforgiveness
Trauma
Fear
Sleep struggles
Emotional upset
Masks
Shame
Performance
Weight of the world
Sick and tired
Lies
Neglect
Judgments
Dishonor
Walls around your heart
Generational sin

No matter what is weighing you down, Jesus is here to bring healing to your heart. He can help you find freedom in each of these areas. You can read that in Isaiah 61.

God provides amazing keys for your freedom. To help you discover some of those keys, here is an article on Keys to Being Real that will show you how to start living in greater freedom.

To read the next article in this series, please visit Keys to Being Real.

If you would like to read all of the articles in the Identity Quest series, you will find them by following this link.

Posted on

Personality, Talents, Passions

Personality, talents, and passions direct you into who God created you to be. God has innately deposited a plumb line into your being – a plumb line of your perfect created self. You can seek that out by pursuing things you enjoy that line up with His will, His Word, and His Spirit.

For example, obviously, drugs and alcohol may make you feel good, but they don’t line up with God’s will, His Word, and His Spirit. But hobbies, talents, giftings, or the pursuit/enjoyment of, help you to see and affirm who He has created you to be.

For example, when you listen to music, or you participate in art, in mindless creative artistic projects, you check out of your mind and into your spirit. And so your spirit is in His Spirit, and His Spirit is in your spirit. You are united with Him in the creative process. When you finish, you will realize you’ve spent time with Him, spirit to Spirit. It affirms God as the creator in you, and affirms His identity in you.

As you begin to step into your true identity, you may notice some lies and dysfunctional behaviors holding you back. That is the work of the enemy – the ultimate identity thief. To learn more about spiritual and emotional identity theft, and how to step into healing, this article on Spiritual Identity Theft can help you see what is weighing you down.

To read the next article in this series, please visit Spiritual Identity Theft.

The following link will take you to all articles in the Identity Quest series.

Posted on

Living out of Your Creative Self

If you are searching for your identity, it’s important to learn how to live out of your creative self. This is living from the perspective of the Creator, so that you’re consciously aware of colors and smells and your senses are heightened. When you live this way, you’re smelling, seeing, hearing, touching, feeling your feet on the ground, and aware consciously of your environment in the moment.

The Word says we all are creative beings, and all uniquely in synch with each other. What is our part in nature? How does nature recalibrate us? How are we recalibrated in line with the Lord? How is our spirit in synch, how does our song tune in with nature and God, how are we a conduit for Him?

The Word says rocks will cry out and every being has a song, so how do we tune into that and calibrate ourselves in line with nature and God … as individuals … in peace and rest … coming out of disharmony, addiction, emotional discord, and hatred. How do we come into the shalom of who, what, and where we are in the universe as a whole?

When you begin answering those questions with your life, you move closer to your true identity.

To read the next article in this series, please visit Personality, Talents, Passions.

To see all of the articles in the Identity Quest series, please follow this link.

Posted on

Art of Identity

If you are searching for your identity, here are some steps that I hope will help you. To find your true identity, you have to recognize your false identities, and you need to discover the things that keep you locked into those lies. You also need to listen to your heart, and listen to God. He knows your real identity. He created your true identity when He created you!

It is God’s desire to help you strip away all the junk that’s been piled up in your heart all these years – your junk, family junk, the world’s junk, the enemy’s junk. He wants you to let go of all that. Recognize where you’ve held onto things that block the truth. Find forgiveness for those who have dishonored your identity. And then walk with Jesus through the cross. That’s where you’ll exchange the lies for the truth of who you really are.

God wants more than anything to restore your true identity to you. Then you can be free to live as who you are meant to be; to enjoy all the desires God has put into your heart. And you can help others find the same freedom He offers.

Are you ready for freedom and true identity?

Here are some ways to start listening to God, and listening to your heart.

Exchanging Good For Bad

Take a pen and paper. Find a quiet place, preferably outside.

Be still.

Be quiet.

Take inventory of your emotions, good and bad.

Make two columns: Good. Bad.

Ask God to show you each emotion.

As He shows you, write the emotion, and ask Him where it came from. One at a time.

Forgive or release the person or the circumstance that caused each negative emotion.

Lay it at the cross.

Thank Him for the good. Offer Him the bad.

Ask God to show you what He wants you to have instead of the bad.

Write that down.

Re-check the negative emotion. Is it still there? If so, repeat the process, writing what you hear on each step.

Where Is Jesus?

Take out your creative journal.

Write your negative emotions, giving them a negative visual appearance.

Write your positive emotions, and give them a positive appearance.

Now draw what’s happening that would have put you in the places where you’re struggling.

Whatever the Lord shows you about the things you are wrestling with, draw that, and include yourself in the picture.

Now ask Jesus where He is.

Draw Him into the picture.

Ask the Lord what He wants to show you about that scene.

Thank Him for the answers.

What Are Your Passions?

Write down your passions, hobbies, ideal job(s). Now give those to the Lord and ask Him how to incorporate this into who He has called you to be. If you had a free pass to create your ideal work responsibility, what would it be? Now present it to the Lord and ask Him to open the doors.

How Do You Hear God?

As you go through this creative process, you might be asking, “How do I hear God?”

He’s not going to speak audibly. He speaks more loudly in silence. You would most likely have an unction to do something, or no sense of peace in moving. That’s how He speaks generally. If you don’t “hear” Him, you’d better not move. Or you’re going to have a whole lot of undoing.

P.S. The more you know Him, the less likely you are to feel Him, either. He will use anything. If a cardinal is symbolic for you, He will send a cardinal. That’s an example of the Lord using your environment to speak to you. A flower, an animal, a cloud, a puppy, newspaper headline, something somebody says.

If you wake up in the morning and you focus on God and read His Word, and ask Him to affirm His Word in your environment throughout the day, and then open your senses to awareness of those opportunities, you’ll start to see God affirm what He gave you in scripture that morning throughout your day.

To read the next article in this series, please visit Living out of Your Creative Self.

You can find all the Identity Quest series articles by following this link.

Posted on

Who Are You?

WHO are you?

I am always amazed at people. I am constantly amazed at the level of individuality and uniqueness of people.

Even more interesting than the uniqueness of folks is the lack thereof.

Have you ever sat on a college campus and watched students pass by? Can you see the lack in their eyes? “Lack” you might say… they are in the prime of their life, no worries, no stress, mostly living off their school loans or even better their parents’ credit cards. But if you really take the time to look deep into their eyes, you’ll see what’s missing.

Now pull back in your perspective and look at humanity. Lack? Absolutely. But they have nice cars, nice houses, successful careers, yes … but do they know who they are? Not usually.

I have just come out of a year-long career change. I have been in inner healing for almost 20 years. For the past 5 years I have been a pastor in a denominational church. After serving in the church for the past 12 years, I started waking up dreading my job. Don’t get me wrong, I LOVED pastoring. I loved teaching and I LOVED preaching. One of the things I love most is worship. I was dreading WORSHIP!!! And suddenly I was dreading everything about my job. I began wondering what is wrong with me?!

And then I knew. I’m done. In hindsight, I realized that for several months I could feel my passion slipping. I knew I wasn’t supposed to be there anymore. And worst of all, my poor husband. What is he going to think? Who (in their right mind) walks away from a comfortable, stable salary and a job where you make your own hours and spend a lot of time just being with people? Me. For whatever reason, my heart was no longer in it.

So, I resigned. To do what? I’m not really sure. But the one thing I do know is that I will not spend my life doing what I’m not supposed to do. And I know when the passion goes, so must the job. Granted, we can’t always love everything about our job. But day after day, I don’t think we are created to live our lives doing things we don’t love. At least, that’s my truth and I’m sticking with it.

My daughter has a chalkboard on her wall and she has written on it: “Life’s too short to pay bills and die.” That’s exactly right. I believe God created us all to live passionately. I believe He has placed specific dreams in all of our hearts, and I don’t believe He would place them there just to frustrate us. So I have set my passion, desires, and energy to find out the keys to life and identity.

Jeremiah 29:11 says, “I know the plans I have for you.” That word “plan” means an “ever-evolving process.” To me, that means God has a plan specifically for me, a plan that satisfies all the desires in my heart. I don’t have to settle by living in a cookie-cutter world, looking or acting like all the other cookies!

Can you imagine? If snowflakes are individually unique and fingerprints are all different then WHY would God make His kids all the same? He is not that boring. He is the Creator. So, wouldn’t it make sense that all of His creations would be absolutely unique?! YES.

Let me try it from a different angle. I like to make art. I will paint anything. (I even let my students paint my Labrador Retriever as a testament to our art project that day.) I love to make art out of anything. Often I have made an image over and over to give for Christmas gifts or whatever. Even though I created the same image (Genesis 1:27) over and over again, every single piece of art is different. If I, just an artist, made the same image over and over, with each one different, can you imagine what the Creator would have the capacity to create?

So, I say all of that to say, WHY? Why would you want to live in somebody else’s personhood? What are you missing out on? What are you depriving the rest of us of? I can’t ever know you, if you can’t know yourself. What a waste!

One of my favorite pieces of art is a piece of pottery that I got out of the trash can. The artist threw it away and I happened to see him. So, I got it out of the trash. It retails in his gallery for over $500. I love the fact that it is a reject. If you knew my history you would know that much of my life would suggest to me that I should live as a reject. But I know my Creator and I know that He created me for a specific purpose and it’s good. Most importantly, I don’t want to miss it. I want to know the purpose and I want to live it.

So, I’m going to live. I am going to live my authentic self and see who I turn out to be.

Besides, the artist that made me and you doesn’t make junk. And He has a plan. And it’s good!

To read the next article in this series, please visit Truth Versus Lies.

You can find all the Identity Quest articles at this link.

Privacy Policy Proudly powered by WordPress